“To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to talk well” – John Marshall

The first step toward mastering better communication skills is to be a better listener. It goes a long way in making communication effective and also plays a crucial role during conflict resolution.

Here are three ways that can help you hone this essential skill you might need to excel at any business communication.

Listening without interpretations

Are you sure what you listened at the last meeting was what was being said? How much information was diluted or distorted by your own interpretation?

Listen with an open mind. You have to train your brain to focus on what is being said – to be in the moment completely. Interpretative listening interferes with complete comprehension of the message. You’re busy interpreting what was said a few minutes back and miss out on what is being said now. Interpretations and judgments must be on your agenda post-listening. Appropriately intervene to clarify any doubts if need be to refocus your listening to stay focused on the interaction and message.

Listening with cultural diversity in mind

Cross cultural communication may present barriers to communication but can be overcome with knowledge and respect for all differences.

With teams working across the globe in different time zones and in different cultures, it is important to hone your listening skills with cultural diversity in mind. It is not only the difference in cultural communication differences but the language barriers which might present obstacles to listening and communication process. What the other person said was perhaps not what he exactly meant or was able to get across since the language of communication was not his/her native one. In such situations it is important to restate what has been said and clarify effectively to ensure what you are listening is ‘correct’.

Listening to what was never said

To listen well you must be aware of both verbal and non-verbal communication. Observe what is not being said and also note that your own body language shows your attentiveness as a keen listener.

Statistics on what percentage of our communication is non-verbal may differ from one analyst to another but it is widely accepted that is well over 50 percent in most cases. And if that’s the case then it pays to give special attention to how to respond, interpret and respect non-verbal communication. Pay special attention to the body language or other visual cues. If you are communicating via non-visual methods then listen carefully to their tone and choice of words.

They’re found in just about every workplace. They can cause increased levels of stress, make you dread coming to work and in worse case scenarios are the reason you quit your job—they are the “difficult coworkers”. But quitting a job that you love because you don’t get along with a co-worker shouldn’t be a reason for your resignation—that’s so high school. While conflicts may arise between you a coworker some point in your career, it’s important that you approach the situation like a mature adult. To learn how to deal with a difficult co-worker, continue reading below.

1. Self Assessment.
   The first thing you want to do is evaluate who is causing the actual friction in the workplace.  While in your mind you are the victim, you might as very well unknowingly be the problem. So do a quick self-assessment. Do you have a history of having difficulties with coworkers in other places of employment? If so, try to evaluate why. Maybe perhaps you have a hot temper or have a sharp tongue. While your close friends may be accustomed to your attitude and know which buttons not to press, your coworkers are most likely in the dark. So you might need to change the way you act/handle yourself in the workplace.

1. Talk in Private.
   If you’ve concluded that it’s not you, (it’s definitely them) then the next step would be to confront your coworker in private and talk it out. Don’t instant chat or email your coworker about the issue you have with them—this can lead to an even heated discussion due to miscommunication (tone is easily lost in translation over the internet).  While having the discussion, it’s important that you do not accuse or attack your coworker. Instead try to sound as sincere as possible and keep your composure while carefully explaining how their actions or words are making you feel. Your co-worker might very well be oblivious that they are having this effect on you.  Whatever the case, three options may result in this discussion1) Your oblivious co-worker may apologize and promise to resolve the issue right on the spot

   2) Your co-worker admits he or she has an issue with you, may say why and then the two of you work out some sort of truce (hopefully) or

   3) Your co-worker lies in your face, says there is no problem and continues to cause problems.  If this last scenario is the case, then move on to the next solution.

1. Talk to You Boss.
   If in any way your coworker is affecting you productivity, you might want to go and give your boss a heads up. Your boss won’t care if your co-worker is gossipy for example, but if the co-worker is sabotaging your  productivity, for instance maybe you are not getting your messages, then you should most definitely address the issue. Make sure to document instances where your coworker prevents you from doing your job. But be prepared that if you approach your boss with the issue, he or she will most likely mandate that the three of you talk it out. But as a result of this 3-way discussion, your boss may be willing to make sure that the two of you are not on the same project, for example.

About the Author:

Donna Reish, a freelancer who blogs about best universities, contributed this guest post.  She loves to write education, career, frugal living, finance, health, parenting relating articles. She can be reached via email at: donna.reish13 [at] gmail [dot] com.

Global 2000 companies have grown their India subsidiaries at a dizzying pace in recent years as a result the CEOs of Hewlett Packard Dell Computer Cisco Intel and others have visited Bangalore Mumbai Hyderabad and Delhi frequently. Simultaneously IT and IT-enabled-services vendors from India have grown their American revenues to over 5 billion a year.

At the early stages of this tidal wave most CIO interactions were focused on immigrants from India who often received graduate degrees from U.S. universities before entering the American workforce. Increasingly though North American IT professionals need to interact directly with their Indian counterparts from India. Even though both sides officially speak English there are significant pitfalls for the uninitiated caused by culture parlance and distance.

It’s 6:30 p.m. on Tuesday and you are finishing up a phone call with Jay your counterpart in Bangalore. Jay tells you that he will get back to you “tomorrow.” Don’t necessarily expect anything on your Wednesday. Remember it is already 8:00 a.m. on Wednesday in Bangalore since Indian Standard Time IST is 13 hours and 30 minutes ahead of Pacific Standard Time. Jay might be implying that he will get back to you when it is Thursday Seattle time but it would be better if he said “Anita I will get back to you on Thursday by 9:00 a.m. your time.”

Jay calls you back on Thursday to say “Anita the change request can be implemented in a couple of weeks when I will be in Seattle.” Jay does not necessarily mean 14 days. In India “couple” is an imprecise measure and often means “a few” not exactly two. It is best to clarify and ask for a specific date.

Jay and his colleague Ram arrive at your Seattle offices “in a couple of weeks” and you are huddled together in an all-morning meeting. Jay shows you the list of remaining software bugs and says “Anita have you and boss ticked off the critical ones?” No he is not asking if you have made anyone upset. He simply wants you to “check off” the critical bugs. You check off the bugs that you care about and say to them “If your developers finish the bug list by Thursday it will be a home run for you!” Perplexed Ram responds “Actually Anita don’t we have the meeting about the new project on Friday afternoon? We won’t be going home until after that meeting.” Baseball is not popular in India and home run is not universally understood.

Mark Nelson Executive Vice President of Global Sourcing for IndyMac Bank says that he is careful to limit the use of American idioms when speaking with his Indian vendors Cognizant Technology Solutions and EXL Service. “I don’t ask them to fish or cut bait we don’t hit singles and doubles and no matter how severe the weather it never rains cats and dogs” he declares having made two trips to India this year. Since American media are ubiquitous in urban India some Americanisms have become common but not all. You may never know the mistakes you are making so it is better to restate key points in non-colloquial terms.

Toward noon you ask your working visitors “Shall we take a break for lunch now?” Jay tilts his head to the side in response. His colleague Ram says “Yes I am famished.” You pause waiting for them to make up their minds. They look you at you wondering if you disagree with them or wish them to make more progress before lunch. You have just encountered the unique “Indian Head Crick.”

Americans indicate yes by moving their heads up and down. Indians might do that but they have a few other ways of nodding yes. One way is to tilt the head sideways with a bit of jerk and it means “Yes of course I agree let’s do it.” Another method involves a “Head Bob” rotating the head on “all three axes” according to Avinash Agarwal who established Sun Microsystems’ India Development Center in Bangalore in 2000. Other regional variations of yes exist and most of them look like a no to the uninitiated American. The former CIO of Echostar Corporation Ed Allwein spent several weeks in Delhi this year working very closely with a team of developers who are writing the code for his current company Active Sensing Inc. “By the end of my trip I had deciphered the head nods of each of my team members except for one” he chuckles.

At the end of the day Jay has to leave earlier than Ram. You see them walking down the hallway arm in arm and one tells the other “I’ll give you a tinkle when we are back at the hotel to see if we can have breakfast tomorrow.” It is perfectly normal for heterosexual men to touch each other in India and tinkle simply means “phone call.”

Next day Ram needs to buy a U.S. adapter for his cell phone and you offer to give him a ride. As you get into the car Jay remarks “The Verizon lady told me that we should not bark in front of the bed’s door.” What? Indians often pronounce the letter “P” like a “B” and the letter “T” like a “D” so he was probably told to not park in front of the pet store. Most Indians pronounce “V” and “W” interchangeably and many Indians from the eastern states pronounce their “V” and “W” like a “B.”

Each culture has its own acronyms and it is helpful to understand some of them when dealing with India. An “NRI” is an Indian living overseas or “non-resident Indian.” Indian immigrants may refer to someone as an ABCD short for American Born Confused Desi a humorous reference to any second-generation Indian living in the North America. If you see the term “FOC” in India it means “free of charge.” An “STD booth” is nothing prurient or dangerous it is simply an attended pay phone short for “subscriber trunk dialing” which is the old name for long-distance calling in India.

Despite these pitfalls the former CIO of MGM Studios Ed Altman now runs the Entertainment and Media practice at Tata Consulting Services out of his Los Angeles office and says he’s had a remarkably easy time adjusting to his Indian colleagues at India’s largest outsourcer. “The studio business is so inherently multicultural and it has been for a long time that I have not had a problem all I have to do is remember to use metaphors around cricket not baseball.” Occasionally when his colleagues are very animated or excited about a customer discussion Altman says that they tend to lapse into Hindi and he has to remind them to switch back so he can participate.

India is a very large and complex country and it is often possible to come to diametrically opposite conclusions about the same subject depending on your perspective. Nelson Altman and Allwein each commented on how “unfailingly polite” attentive and courteous the Indians appear in dealing with them. Yet they are seldom polite to strangers in public spaces the concept of waiting in line does not exist in most places in India. Allwein learned the meaning of “Indian Stretchable Time” during his recent stay in Delhi. “People would keep me waiting up to 30 minutes and more as a matter of routine. Not once did anyone show up early for an appointment.” Yet his software delivery schedules have been met accurately. “For a year-long project I am within two weeks of the initial projected delivery date and that is excellent.”

“Although there are times when nuances in language and speaking styles may result in restatement of a comment or two for purposes of clarification there are no language barriers that inhibit the successful conduct of business—or building friendships” concludes Nelson with a twinkle. “After all we’re all just chips off the same old block.”

This article originally appeared in the CIO magazine a few years back, reproduced with the author’s permission. Content Copyright Gunjan Bagla.

About the Author:

Gunjan Bagla has 25 years of global sourcing, engineering, and marketing experience. He has held senior positions in technology sales and marketing. Bagla has managed teams sourcing products and services from China, India, Japan, and the rest of Asia. He began his career as an engineer for Larsen & Toubro, Bangalore, a prominent Indian industrial firm. Mr. Bagla came to the U.S. and later worked as Director of Program Management for Tandon Computer.

Based in California, he is the author of the acclaimed title “Doing Business in 21st Century India: How to Profit Today from tomorrow’s most exciting Market” published in July 2008 by Warner/Hachette Books

Find out more about Gunjan Bagla’s company at their website.

What’s wrong in being Bossy?

All in all we do not like bossy people, chances are you would have heard your little child come to you and say, “Mom/dad, I don’t like her/him in my class, she/he’s too bossy!” Children also relate bossiness to bullies – it is an intimidating act and certainly not likeable. Often people do want to be told what to do and how to do it but the way you tell them how matters the most, if you appear bossy and controlling people would not want to be around you. It is the human nature; we don’t want to be ordered around on what to do – most often. So at the workplace you have to strike a gentle note to your being the boss around – and try not to be “bossy”.

How not to be Intimidating and still be In-charge

To be a good leader you must make sure that the work gets done and often it is not through pleasantries that you can get that accomplished, instead of high-handedness have some rules in place at all times.
Here are some examples of the written rules you can pass on to your team. Somehow written rules do not appear “bossy” if you say them out over and over again perhaps they are not taken in that effectively.

• The task must be complete a week before the deadline so we can ensure a run-through of the quality of the product.
• Every week you must send a detailed status report on your tasks.
• Inform me of any changes to the plan immediately.
• You must be present at the monthly team meeting, else propose a one-on-one if you cannot attend the next one.

Never lose sight of the fact that you are the boss and certain expectations are around this word and role. It is because of rules and a fear of unpleasant consequences (read poor performance review) that many employees get a lot accomplished in a little time.
Dos and don’ts are great and when you know how to strike a good balance in how you are asking these from your employees, you can expect more respect and work get done. And of course “being nice” always is not on your job description, you better get the work done and done well and if you can accomplish this through good team relationship then that’s where you would qualify for the good bosses’ hall of fame.

You might also want to read some articles on this website if you do not want to be listed in books of “bad bosses” – BadBossology.

What are your ways of being “bossy” the right way?

We thrive in trust and freedom.

In business management, micromanagement is a management style where a manager closely observes or controls the work of his or her subordinates or employees. Micromanagement is generally used as a negative term.
(Source: Wikipedia)

What are the upsides to micromanagement?

Not all employees are the same, some flourish with limited managing and enjoy working in an independent work environment; however there are some who need close monitoring and coaching until they feel confident to get things done efficiently and to the quality that the work demands. For such employees some level of micromanaging is beneficial.

Some examples:

A New Employee

Take for instance a new employee who is joining your team on his/her first job; there are fears, uncertainties and inexperience that stalls this person from doing his/her best at work; it is time to step and act as a coach and also add some sprinkles of micromanagement to monitor and direct this person in the right direction.

It can be done the efficient way. It would be good to convey to your new employee that during a certain time period you would be going through all process and project tasks in good details. Your expectations would be to regularly inform on the task progress and request feedback on the short-term goals set by you.

When you convey your expectations with mutual understanding – you cut down on mis-communication and add respect to your management style. Remember efficient communication is the key to getting things done the right way – or your way.

In most cases your employee/team member feels reassured that there is someone to double check his/her work and the first job jitters are not as strong as before.

If regular resorting is what can make things streamlined – go for it, but let your team know about it. If such processes are well defined then sure enough micromanagement takes on a new meaning – not that negative anymore.

And in other cases you can do the same for an employee who is not performing well and has received poor performance reports. Perhaps this person needs some help and if it could come from you or some other co-worker then again some micromanagement is worth getting this employee back on track or even finding out that perhaps he can be best suited for another job.
As you see in certain cases, micromanagement helps. But remember when treading this tricky path, tact and a goal must be in mind all the time.

Are we not all Micromanagers? We do it all the time!

Have you ever been micromanaged or have you micromanaged someone? What were your feelings and how did you respond to the situation? Do comment!

“Regular Brainstorming is as critical to an organization as regular exercise to your health. It creates a responsive and innovative culture.” ~Tom Kelley

You might be a manager at a company, an entrepreneur or a an employee organizing a meeting, you could be starting out on building a new app or an innovative tool or gadget. And you could be just another job hunter in a group trying to work through a plan on a successful career or job hunt.

What’s your first step – to gather ideas – to brainstorm.

There are several ideas that come to you as you visualize your product, or just the best possible solutions to your problem. Some of the possible solutions could be bizarre, some practical and some not-so-practical. But each of them excites you to a new possibility. How do you proceed?
Trial and error can be costly and time consuming; the most efficient way to bring your ideas to life lies in the success of brainstorming and planning on what the ultimate product or solution would be like.

Howsoever seldom you might have indulged in brainstorming, but you cannot claim that you have never brainstormed. Brainstorming is integral to our daily lives.
This article takes you in-depth on the “art of brainstorming” and how to make best out of it.

What is Brainstorming?

According to Wikipedia:
Brainstorming is a group creativity technique designed to generate a large number of ideas for the solution of a problem.
In 1953 the method was popularized by Alex Faickney Osborn in a book called Applied Imagination. Osborn proposed that groups could double their creative output with brainstorming.
So the keywords here are: group activity, ideas, solution to a problem. Other than this explanation, brainstorming promotes exchange and reinvention of ideas as well. It promotes team building, creative thinking and simply perks up the process of evolution of your idea!

When and How do we Brainstorm

Well almost every time we have a problem. You may need new ideas or solution to a problem and brainstorming helps you to branch out on the problem and find some effective and possible solutions of which you may choose those best applicable to your particular situation. Also note that brainstorming can be done on your won also when you research, categorize and analyze the solutions to a problem all on your own. However it is most effective when done in a group or with those you trust or are important to that issue. Brainstorming in a team brings out diverse and perhaps more qualified solutions to the problem since the people in your brainstorming session may bring in fresh, experienced perspective enabling you to find a better solution to the problem. Also it is fun to brainstorm in a group, you never know where one solution or discussion may take you – to a completely new idea or just a happy healthy discussion which freshens and lightens up your day! In addition many teams encourage brainstorming sessions in groups to strengthen teamwork and to spot the leaders (or movers or shakers) in the team.

Different Brainstorming Techniques

Some Articles on Brainstorming Techniques:

• There is a list of around 25 brainstorming techniques listed on the Personal Excellence blog, read for further enlightenment.

• Creative Brainstorming Techniques from Entrepreneur Magazine

• Josh Linkner on Forbes.com has some great tips for you – The 10 Commandments Of Brainstorming.

Brainstorming Software and Tools

In world of apps and brilliant software that can or claim to manage almost every problem in your work life, there would be some brainstorming software and tools which assist us along the way.

• Mindtools: A very informative article on brainstorming comes from the MindTools website and here you can also get the Brainstorming Toolkit for free. While on this website don’t forget to look up Mind Maps, very interesting and might make your brainstorming sessions productive and efficient.

• Microsoft Visio is also one of the software available that enables you to transfer ideas on paper or computer. As the MS website explains: “You’re in a brainstorming meeting. You have a ton of ideas. Members in your team are contributing even more. How do you quickly capture these ideas while creating a record you can analyze, edit, and act on later? When you create a diagram in Visio while you meet or brainstorm, you create a visual archive of your ideas. The diagram can help you quickly recognize and order themes and hierarchies, making it a snap to pull a plan of action out of a chaotic idea-generating session.”

• Mindjet: According to their website: MindManager uses a free-form visual format that mirrors the way your brain processes information, so it’s easy and intuitive to use.

• ConceptDraw MINDMAP Brainstorming software – (according to their website) is ideal for effective brainstorming, creative thinking, idea generating, lateral thinking, creativity and problem solving. It provides powerful tools and versatile means for both personal and team brainstorming sessions.

Efficient Brainstorming Lead to Actions

Similar to the difference in making a meeting efficient or meaningless, brainstorming sessions can prove to be very fruitful or just go off tangent without any concrete results; it all depends on how efficiently you had planned and executed these sessions – either on individual brainstorming or group sessions.

“The ideas that come out of most brainstorming sessions are usually superficial, trivial, and not very original. They are rarely useful. The process, however, seems to make uncreative people feel that they are making innovative contributions.”
-A. Harvey Block

Always remember the main aim of the brainstorming session; it is to present a list of many possible solutions to your problem or idea.

• Do not filter any suggestions in the first run. The idea is to have a mega list of all proposed ideas, trimming is not a priority now. Never cut short on any idea or presentation deeming it impossible, because there are very few things which are truly impossible. You can be pleasantly surprised how possible solution number 3 and 56 combined together can present the ultimate answer you were looking for.

• Another tip: “Anyone can brainstorm”, you may be surprised by your 6 year old presenting a simple solution to your problem which your complex brain had never thought of before – so be prepared to be surprised and do not hold any preconceived notion about anyone – be open and receiving in your brainstorming session.

Now with the aim clear in the mind let’s explore some efficient ways to brainstorm.
Team brainstorming sessions: if you are holding team sessions ensure that each and every member of the team knows what they are expected to do during the meeting and what preparations must be done before they step in the room or telephone /web conference for the brainstorming session.

• Templates or worksheets must be circulated within the team at least a week or 10 days before your brainstorming session, it gives them the time to set aside time for this task and not jeopardizing their own work deadlines. The bottom line is prepare yourself first; be clear on your expectations of the session and convey accordingly.

• They must be clear on the time bound meetings expectations; if they can be given only 10 minutes to present their ideas and later on 15 minutes for general discussion – convey upfront.

• Conducive Environment for your meeting is equally important. If the brainstorming sessions are going to be half day or day long, ensure that you give enough stretch time and meet other needs as good food, drinks and just relaxing-getting-to-know-each-other-time. Stressful situations most often do not result in creative results.

• Tools and Software simplify the process. As mentioned above you may use some available tools and software to record and structure the session discussions. You may also poll others to find out what has worked the best for them before – if they had been in other brainstorming sessions.

• Encourage the group members to form smaller groups and present ideas after certain time. Two heads together often can present a better idea when working together. The idea is to foster deeper creative thinking.

• Encourage participants for follow-up. At times some of the best ideas strike to us after the session is over. Poll participants if a follow-up session would be beneficial to the group or if they would like to convey ideas individually to you later on. But make sure you have a date in mind, do not leave this proposal hanging to “any other future date”.

Resources on Brainstorming

• HOW has some good tips on 14 Ways to Brainstorm More Effectively

• InnovationTools has a wealth of relevant articles on brainstorming

• A website dedicated to brainstorming Brainstorming that Works offers many other articles and tips on effective brainstorming (this webpage has a lot of links and with too much information there is a possibility to get lost in the information maze, so click on those that you really seek info on)

• Some other good tips you can find here on BusinessBalls brainstorming technique for problem-solving, team-building and creative process

• There have been numerous books published on Brainstorming and you can search these on Amazon website.

Brainstorming excites creative thinking, present opportunity to think differently and provide a new twist to the solution, through brainstorming sessions arise the possibilities of something new, your ideas may find new solutions or even new ideas may sprout thereafter. So, next time when you are ready to start something new, give brainstorming the utmost priority.

What are your thoughts and experience on holding efficient brainstorming sessions. Pls share in comments below.

1. This person might have an intention to excite or provoke you to a confrontation, beware! Losing your cool can only cost you your reputation and of course peace of mind. Whatever happens, try to take it in calmly and prefer to respond back at a later time if you feel anger surging. Responding back, or retaliating in any way must be avoided unless of course if it is to protect yourself physically.
2. Listen first. Often we tend to pass a judgment fast on what is being said even before it is finished. Listening enables better understanding and also helps you present points objectively when your turn comes.
3. Emotions must be excluded at work at all times. Anger, retaliation and even crying are not taken well at the workplace. You are there to work and throw your emotions around. Even though you might encounter personal attacks or accusations, don’t take it personally.
4. Ignore and don’t entertain. At times this method works out the best; but not always. When the trouble makers feel that you have no effect on their daily rambling and back-biting; they might just move on. But if this habit goes unreported then there is some other co-worker who will suffer because of your non-reporting.
5. However, when push comes to shove; or you feel you are unable to focus on your work because of negative interruptions or mental abuse; it is time to talk to the supervisor. Ask for suggestions on how to deal with the situation. Rather than just ranting out your disconcertion, first plan out on how you would want to present this case to your boss. Also it would be good to have some written or your recorded version of some incidents which help in reducing time going back and forth. It is best to ask someone, and you will get better advice.
6. Keep a record of each incident on how this coworker has affected your work or productivity. It might help you in strengthening a case later on if situation gets to accusations and more trouble from this coworker.
7. Never write an email when you are upset. Written words stay somewhere forever and you would not want any skeletons in your cupboard just because of a hasty action after an unpleasant incident at work. Take time to respond, analyze accusations for at least an hour and this time will help you stabilize your thoughts. Articulation and explanation improves when the mind is at peace.

Have you come across difficult people at work? How have you dealt with them?

Procrastination is [moral] defilement, continued procrastination is defilement. By non procrastination [punctuality] and knowledge, root out your darts [of sin].
(Utthana Sutta, v. 4)

Get the work done now, meet deadlines and keep your boss posted on the updates. Do not procrastinate.

He who walks in the company of fools, suffers a long way; company with fools, as with an enemy, is always painful; company with the wise is pleasure, like meeting with kinsfolk. (Dhammapada, v. 207)
Therefore one ought to follow the wise, the intelligent, the learned, the much-enduring, the dutiful; one ought to follow a good and wise man as the moon follows the path of the stars. (Dhammapada, v. 208)

Keep good company at work; collaborate with those more knowledgeable than you are and impart knowledge to new hires. Make your day at the workplace more meaningful and fulfilling.

From whomsoever a man learns the Law; he should worship him, even as the gods worship Indra. The learned man, being thus honoured, his mind pleased with [his disciple], makes the Law more manifest.
(Nava Sutta, v. 1)

If you have a mentor – thank him/her, if you don’t seek one. Respect your job and thank those who impart you the knowledge to do better.

 There exists no spot on the earth, or in the sky, or in the sea, neither is there any in the mountain-clefts, where an [evil deed does not bring trouble to the doer].

(Udanavarga, ix, v. 5) 

Don’t lose your work ethics and always work towards the better good and development of your team and company. Plan and act towards the greater benefit for your team and company; make your daily contribution – howsoever small, when put together it results somewhere in big revenues for your company.

 The fault of others is easily perceived, but that of oneself is difficult to perceive; the faults of others one lays open as much as possible, but one’s own fault one hides, as a cheat hides the bad die from the gambler.

If a man looks after the faults of others, and is always inclined to detract, his own weakness will grow.
(Dhammapada, vv. 252, 253)

Your boss or your co-workers may not always be right and there could be office politics that you detest; the best way to focus on your work and personal development is to steer clear of it all. Do not accuse colleagues or bosses; do your job and if the going gets tough work towards finding a solution not retaliation.


Source of the Buddhism teachings: The Golden Rules of Buddhism Compiled by H.S. Olcott

Want and Have
There are two aspects of working weekends: one that you want to work and the other that you have to work.
Want is more for the love, obsession and excitement of the work that you do. Have is more towards meeting a deadline, pressure or extra monetary benefits.
The reasons may differ but the point is that you are working on a day ‘supposed’ to be spent away from work. Often continuous work leads to stress; stress affects performance and the overall result that you seek from work.
When you say yes to a lot of things in life, you say no to others, it is up to you to decide which to choose.

The Upsides and Downsides of a Working Weekend
One of the upsides of a working weekend is you are at home and working and not at the mall and spending money so perhaps some money saved. Another probability is you might cook at home and not eat out and that retains some more bucks in your pocket.

The downside, of course you are missing out on the ‘life beyond work’. As has been always said, when you are on your deathbed would you regret more not getting on that project deadline 25 years before or not finding time to spend with your little ones and they grew up so fast and now so detached from you?
Working weekends can become a habit if you fall in the trap of getting more done; there will always be work and it will never be done. Does this sound familiar – it was just another weekend and with no deadlines, I could have stepped away from the computer but had failed to notice that now it is my addiction to continuous work that I inadvertently opened my laptop and saw that of course there were some other tasks I could do to get a head start on the next week..

If you are one of those addicted to working weekends, question yourself first:
Are you working today because you enjoy work or has it now become and addiction? Checking emails, social networking and blogging lure us from our family time and into the cyberspace; what are you losing out on being online today?

Exceptions apart – Move Away from Work during Weekends
Don’t make work your obsession, make it a part of your life and with everything else in life ensure that you try to give some time to each activity that you love and that is important to you. Agreed, there is a lot of work and pressure but look back and see when was there not? Take time to step out and do things that mean more to you than work.
The time we invest on things that matter to us now will matter to us in future, don’t fall in the trap “Honey, it’s just this weekend. I’ll stay away from work the next one.”
Of course there will be some exceptions and we have to put in something extra at times to get so far, but don’ t make it a habit and we can do it by making a conscious effort of reminding us when we do.

Often I hear people justifying their working weekends by saying that they are good multitaskers, they can be at work and also do the chores at home and spend time with family. For them, I would like to share this a adapted excerpt from macronews.com:

A CEO was having a conversation with his 10 year daughter. He was focused on several things as he listened to her speak. She soon realized that she didn’t have her father’s complete attention. “No dad,” she reproached. “I want you to listen with girl ears.”
In today’s fast paces world, multitasking has become the norm. We read our emails while listening to our voicemails, talk on our cell phones while paying for the groceries, write a report while watching our kids soccer game.
We believe that we’re making the most efficient use of our time. But how much information do we fail to process when we’re not engaged in any one activity? If we are too busy to give our undivided attention to a loved one, neighbors, or colleague, are we too busy to care?

Do you work on weekends and if so, do you enjoy working on weekends?
Also;
What would you do if you did not work and turn on the computer for 2 consecutive days?

This is an excerpt from a article in Knowledge at Wharton. It had me thinking for a long time, whatever happened to the good old saying that you plan to fail if you fail to plan. That is a direct mention to setting goals in life. Though setting goals has been an integral part of our personal and work life, this article does present interesting thoughts on how to be reasonable while setting goals.
WE all have goals in our lives which motivate us to do something to get closer to them and that is what excites us to begin our day with enthusiasm and fervor. Some goals are reachable and make us content however some fall flat and those we might discard as bad ideas or unrealistic goals that were beyond our capabilities. Whatever the case may be, it is very important for us to revisit our goals often and revise them. To thrive in whatever we do we must adapt and change; and so must our goals.

Whatever their take on setting goals may be, I loved professor Maurice Schweitzer’s explanation and reference to “hedonic treadmill”; quoting from the article:
“The notion of a hedonic treadmill, says Schweitzer, “is that people never ‘get’ to where they are going. For example, people constantly pursue happiness, but don’t get there. They keep thinking that the next promotion, the new car, the salary raise, etc. will make them happy. They get the promotion, and that makes them happy for a time. Then they adapt and mistakenly think that it’s the next promotion that will make them happy.
“People may be motivated by goals. But these goals can crowd out intrinsic motivation, so they will need more goals to motivate them in the future.”

How often are you just in the wild race to attain your goals and have felt that you have never had the satisfaction of “being there”?