How would you define yourself as a working mother (if you are one)?Happiest, happy, just getting along, overworked and tired, miserable or “don’t know” (the one who has no time to gauge your emotions in the ever rush of getting tasks done)?
Reading Lucy’s answers on FT.com columns had me thinking on who and what makes you appear in the happiest working mothers list?
Lucy says:
- It struck me recently that the happiest are the women who do little or no paid work and concentrate on their children. But then I realised they are the least ambitious and so are likely to be happiest anyway. The next happiest are the ones with successful full-time jobs, who let their husbands and nannies take charge at home.The least happy are the ones who are both doggedly committed to work and who want to be proper mothers too. Trying to do both usually means the mother will be in tears before bedtime, even if the children are not.
There are some very interesting comments to this article.. do read. (a glimpse here of the many comments on this post)
- — I couldn’t wait to return to work but now, after 3 years of paid nannies (big bucks), the novelty of being a ‘working mother’ (oh and by the way the ‘mummy track’ does exist – big time!) has well and truly worn off and we are fed up of other people bringing up our child. My partner, the lesser paid wage slave, has negotiated flexible working times to become a stay at home dad
— And just be grateful that you are not having this same problem in America, where women take an average of six weeks’ maternity leave, flexible working is a joke, and employees have little to no rights.
Hmm,… my thoughts on the article – it is a very relevant topic always and for every generation and the thoughts expressed are right in many ways.
In my experience with working with full time and part-time working mothers I have found that the happiest indeed are the ones with full time jobs and a earning a decent salaries but have made their lives easier by either hiring a nanny or delegating different household tasks like cooking, cleaning, laundry and picking up kids from school to paid services. Of course all these tasks require you to shelve out a good amount of money, but if you can buy happiness with money won’t you do that?
In my experience with working with full time and part-time working mothers I have found that the happiest indeed are the ones with full time jobs and a earning a decent salaries but have made their lives easier by either hiring a nanny or delegating different household tasks like cooking, cleaning, laundry and picking up kids from school to paid services. Of course all these tasks require you to shelve out a good amount of money, but if you can buy happiness with money won’t you do that?
If I am given a choice to save this money monthly and be miserable daily since I would be overworked and tired as opposed to sparing and saving extra cash to pay for these services I would choose the latter.
What would you do?
I am a great proponent of part-time working mothers too. I feel to keep ambitions and aspirations alive a woman can feel complete and guilt-free (well, almost) if she works part-time and can spend some quality time with kids also. This arrangement helps the woman to feel financially independent and also continue with the very important aspect in life, raising “feeling-loved” and “spent-quality-time-with” kids. Although this may not work out for everyone but if the society and the employers support (of course government policies will make al the difference too) such a support for the working mother, the world would be a much happier place.
What would you do?
I am a great proponent of part-time working mothers too. I feel to keep ambitions and aspirations alive a woman can feel complete and guilt-free (well, almost) if she works part-time and can spend some quality time with kids also. This arrangement helps the woman to feel financially independent and also continue with the very important aspect in life, raising “feeling-loved” and “spent-quality-time-with” kids. Although this may not work out for everyone but if the society and the employers support (of course government policies will make al the difference too) such a support for the working mother, the world would be a much happier place.
“Happiest working mother” is a debatable topic because even what you perceive as the happiest have their problems.. life is hard woman but make the most of it …
After I had this post online, I happened to read a similar article on The Huffington Post and just have to mention some stats they have there:
The above picture has been taken from the same post, the label says:
Average happiness index value for the period 1972-2006 Source: Based on responses to question 157 of the General Social Surveys
Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/whats-happening-to-womens_b_289511.html
`”Hey,” you might say. “Life’s tough. Deal with it.” And of course, you’d be right. Life is not designed with anyone’s happiness in mind, and it has the disconcerting habit of not rewarding the good as much as we’d expect, of punishing the wicked less vigorously than we’d like, and even, on occasion, of getting the two completely mixed up.
Even so, only the most wasted of cynics would deny that something’s got to give. Not only is this “tough life” significantly tougher on women than it is on men, but the advances of the last 40 years were supposed to have changed things for the better. And not just for womankind, but for each individual woman. The hard-won rights, opportunities, and advantages were supposed to have netted women more than just another burdensome role to play–“you at work.” They were supposed to have fostered in each woman feelings of fulfillment and happiness, and even, for the special few, the sustained thrill of living of an authentic life.This hasn’t happened. Over the last 40 years or so, life is not trending toward more fulfillment for women; life is, in most ways we can measure, becoming more draining instead. To use Thomas Jefferson’s words, though women now have the liberty to choose whichever life they’d like, many are struggling in their pursuit of a happy life.
Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/whats-happening-to-womens_b_289511.html
Sure enough – What’s going on?
Although the above article cites that the unhappiness is not because of women working more hours but I would most certainly say that what has happened in the last 40 years or so has seen more women in the workforce and the happiness levels have gone down, no matter how hard we are trying to “un”complicate our lives. To work two shifts certainly drains out the woman and how can you expect a “happy return”? Of course there are exceptions everywhere but in general women must try their best to ease off on multitasking and begin delegating more.
What are your thoughts on this topic? Please comment.